I'm not gonna sleep early tonight, probably 'cuz i'm fretting over things i shouldn't be worried about. God, let Your will be done (:

There's a high chance that i won't be able to go to France, yeah.. *cries & screams * Due to the upcming concert, sigh. Hope i can go still, prolly the only thing that made me happy when i was down ): The only thing that made me so excited, till i couldn't even believe it when i was told.

I FELT LIKE MY WORLD CAME CRASHING DOWN WHEN I RECEIVED THE NEWS.

Just when i thought things were gonna be perfect, exactly one month from now ): It's the 28th today. Why do i have to know this, right after all that planning. Clothes, jackets, shoes, money, even the food i'm gonna bring. I can't accept this just like that ): Well, i don't know what's going on. Just want to pray hard and hope i'd be able to go. I don't wanna let it be missed.

This is gonna be an emo post. It's for two close friends in my life (:

I did my best, and probably all that i could to make you forgive me. It was seriously a big misunderstanding between both of us. Yeah i know you won't be reading this, but i really want to tell you how i feel. I'm sorry for not finding out the truth before tryna " joke " with you, that's my character when i talk on msn. I just wished that there was this angel to speak to you bout what exactly happened. I feel so accused. Yet partly it was my fault. You're not my close nor very good friend, but i don't know why i got so worried just 'cuz of this. Perhaps 'cuz you're one of my closest, just that i didn't realise. I've so much to overcome right now, and i find it hard to continue apologising to you. I think i've done it all, even wishing for God to speak to you. I'm so confused right now, can't stop but hoping things would be fine ): &that you'd find out the truth. This issue is the only thing restricting me from everything that cheers me up.



And lastly, this is for ♥you (:
Is our friendship causing us to show our differences between both of us? This isn't the main point, if i'm able to accept others for who they are, what makes you think that i can't, to you that has been so important in my life huh? It's been almost a week since we really talked like we used to. You don't know how happy i was when you said bye to me today ;D Just when i thought i was gonna walk pass you just like that. I miss the 2 person chicken rice we used to share that costs $7.50, your " oh yeah! " (s) followed by my " stop oh-yeahing please!!! ", the polka dotted shoes you have, the retarded look we gave when we camwhored, the hugs you gave me, &when you always argued with me over our performance right after our exam papers. " If you fail then i what! negative 0 ah! " (: It's tough leaving a gap in between, you know. I do find it a lil hard too. But nothing's too hard, with God's never-die attitude in us! I'm not letting go, i'm not ending it. That's all i am sure about. Someday i'd be wishing to see your pretty smile again :) &there's definitely still a reason why my display picture is still us. It's cuz i believe you're still my bitch :D It just feels weird not talking when we meet or on msn. Especially when normally after two days, MSN would have this stupid thing that pops up" Your message history for ____ has blahblah. Delete or save in another file " See, i rememeber it clearly! (: No matter how hard i try to avoid that feeling, it doesn't work. Cuz i miss you so much[:

Love,
Jermaine.

- I love You Goddddddddddd :D